“There is a distinction between fact and truth. Truth has an element of revelation about it. If something is true, it does more than strike one as merely being so. ” Lucian Freud

How would you react if you discovered that your significant other was cheating on you? Or that your BFF was running your name in the ground? Or hitting on your mate? How about when you overhear your family member talking about you? How would you respond to these occurrences?

Our natural instincts of hurt, anger, rage, and disappointment are probably understatements on how we’d react and understandably so because heartbreaks hurt. One thing we ALL have in common is that we’ve ALL written and sung our own version of “they dun, dun me wrong song.” Because more than likely, we’ve all experienced when someone has hurt us to our core. It may have been a friend, a spouse or significant other, a child, a teacher, a parent, a neighbor, a cousin but inevitably someone has let us down by betraying our trust through their words, actions and deeds. It’s not a good feeling and sometimes we don’t think we are able to bounce back from this type of pain. But we can and will IF we recognize these occurrences as gifts. I know, I know, how could something this painful be a gift? How can finding out something that could destroy my family, and/or ruin my friendships be viewed as a gift?

Well, that’s EXACTLY what it is- A GIFT. It is the gift of REVELATION. Revelation is defined “as a surprising fact that makes you look at things in a new way” and a surprise to me means there is a gift lurking somewhere. But, when we unwrap the gift of revelation, not only is what we’re made of exposed but we also discover who we’re dealing with and how they truly feel and think about us. In reality, it’s NOT even about the actual revelation of the event or occurrence, it’s about the gifts that revelation bears. Revelation provides us with clarity, information, and knowledge which are the most powerful tools in any relationSHIP.

A few years ago, a friend shared with me a conversation that she had with another so-called friend about me. It wasn’t anything serious but the friend who told me wouldn’t have known the elements, so I knew it was true. I was hurt and disappointed because I thought she and I were cool, however, something else was revealed. She expected some sort of confrontation and I wasn’t about to entertain her foolishness. Instead of getting angry, I was grateful for the gift because NOW I knew who she was and she would learn who I really was. I see her every August at a picnic andI’m the first to speak as a reminder to her that I know who she really is. Based on my knowledge of her, the gift of revelation afforded me the opportunity to see her for who she really is which then enabled me to reposition her in my life.

No one likes to be made a fool of and that’s what betrayal does. It’s painful and destructive and unfortunately, it’s a part of our life experiences simply because we can’t control the decisions and choices of another human being. In relationSHIPS, we can only believe that the people we allow to board our SHIP are trustworthy and that they will not hurt us or betray our trust. But once again, that is something beyond our control.

So the next time you are the recipient of the gift of revelation, use it wisely. Assess the revelation, the players, and with your new information, make a choice that will benefit you and your life moving forward. Come up with some resolutions that propel you forward. No matter what you decide whether its stay and work it out, forgive, or go your separate ways -be confident knowing that your decision was based not on the revelation itself but its gifts AND YOUR truth. So ALWAYS consider revelation as a gift and simply live in the light of its awareness.

SHIP TALK: Have you ever experienced the gift of revelation? Did you view it as a gift? Do you think revelation can be a gift? How did you handle the revelation?

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  1. That’s our natural instinct and there is nothing wrong with that,I am just suggesting before we match our pain, explore the options. It’s not the time to give your power away, it’s the time to reclaim it.

  2. Lorenzo, just trying to REVEAL there are many ways to look at the dark moments. Not knowing that something is going on behind your back it worse than knowing to me. So I consider knowing the actual gift because it empowers me to do me.

  3. I do admit that I struggle getting past the hurtful part of revelation. I tend to want my actions to match my pain. Thanks for reminding me of the healthy alternatives.

  4. Well ok Val, You have opened my eyes to something I never even thought of, I normally just disconnect from a person or people when they begin to make me feel uncomfortable. This has been how I move on, to avoid confrontations or denials. Thank you for this “Eye Opener” from Revelations👍🏾

  5. Yes indeed. Sometimes, our greatest lessons come from dark times. But we emerge wiser and stronger.

  6. Hi Val,
    Great blog and so true! I agree revelation in this context is hurtful, but necessary. Even negative experience is the best teacher.

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