“A bad atitude is like a flat tire, you can’t go anywhere unless you change it.” Unknown
Have you ever been out having a good time only to have it ruined by someone else’s negative attitude? It has happened to us all at some point. But why? Why do people have bad attitudes? Do people with bad attitudes know that they have them? Do you think they understand how their attitude can and does impact others? But, what is an attitude? An attitude is our personal beliefs toward something or someone and is usually expressed in the forms of likes and dislikes. Simply put, an attitude is how we feel. We have a CHOICE every day regarding which attitude-good or bad- that we CHOOSE to embrace for the day. But, if it’s a choice, why would anyone CHOOSE to have a bad attitude?
Realistically, attitudes are mental positions that we assume or learn based on experiences that we can’t change, our past hurts, and the fact that people do things to us that we may not like. Thus, some people, based on their life experiences, CHOOSE to have a bad attitude. But, a bad attitude can suck the life out of a room. It can make or break a relationSHIP, a company, a church, a home, and a family. A bad attitude can totally destroy a life. Yet, most people are unaware of how their bad attitude influences and impacts their behavior which also influences and impacts the attitude and behaviors of others?
Every August, me and about 30 of my girlfriends attend the smooth jazz festival at the Hollywood Bowl. We have a ball- drinking, eating, singing, dancing, and laughing. Every year it’s the same group of ladies but this year, I invited someone that socially I had NOT hung out with before and boy did it change our jovial vibe. I sensed a negative vibe immediately when we met her at the park and ride to catch the shuttle bus. As I introduced her to some of the group, I noticed she wasn’t very receptive but on the bus ride over, she and a friend stuck up a conversation and I was relieved there was a connection. Boy was I wrong.
Throughout the evening, she was very emotional and constantly complained. She cried because she broke a plastic champagne flute that she had borrowed from a friend. Huh? Here we are listening to Dave Koz and she’s in tears about a broken plastic flute-something that couldn’t be resolved at that moment. I suggested that she relax and look at the bright side and she responded sarcastically that wasn’t an option for her. At that moment, she CHOSE to have a bad attitude and I respected her choice BUT I refused to let her attitude negatively influence and impact my attitude and behavior. Since she didn’t know me well, she didn’t know that I am a professional “ignorer” and she was about to experience some of my best work. So despite her tears and bad attitude, I just sang louder and danced harder and refused to let her bad attitude interfere with my good time and as I do every year, I had a ball.
I honestly don’t believe that she intentionally set out to ruin our outing because she didn’t, she couldn’t. However, I don’t think she understood the negative impression and impact she was having on our group with her bad attitude. Because if she had, she would have known that having a bad attitude is an assurance that more than likely won’t fully experience TRUE friendSHIPS. Because at next year’s smooth jazz at the Hollywood Bowl, it will only be 29 of us going. Lastly, if you have a bad attitude think about how it negatively influences your attitude and behavior but also negatively impacts the attitude and behaviors of others. If you want to enjoy life and others, simply LOSE THE ATTITUDE!!!
SHIP TALK: Do you have a bad attitude? Why? Have you changed your attitude? How?
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