“A bad atitude is like a flat tire, you can’t go anywhere unless you change it.” Unknown

Have you ever been out having a good time only to have it ruined by someone else’s negative attitude?  It has happened to us all at some point. But why? Why do people have bad attitudes? Do people with bad attitudes know that they have them? Do you think they understand how their attitude can and does impact others? But, what is an attitude? An attitude is our personal beliefs toward something or someone and is usually expressed in the forms of likes and dislikes. Simply put, an attitude is how we feel. We have a CHOICE every day regarding which attitude-good or bad- that we CHOOSE to embrace for the day. But, if it’s a choice, why would anyone CHOOSE to have a bad attitude?

Realistically, attitudes are mental positions that we assume or learn based on experiences that we can’t change, our past hurts, and the fact that people do things to us that we may not like. Thus, some people, based on their life experiences, CHOOSE to have a bad attitude. But, a bad attitude can suck the life out of a room. It can make or break a relationSHIP, a company, a church, a home, and a family. A bad attitude can totally destroy a life. Yet, most people are unaware of how their bad attitude influences and impacts their behavior which also influences and impacts the attitude and behaviors of others?

Every August, me and about 30 of my girlfriends attend the smooth jazz festival at the Hollywood Bowl. We have a ball- drinking, eating, singing, dancing, and laughing. Every year it’s the same group of ladies but this year, I invited someone that socially I had NOT hung out with before and boy did it change our jovial vibe. I sensed a negative vibe immediately when we met her at the park and ride to catch the shuttle bus. As I introduced her to some of the group, I noticed she wasn’t very receptive but on the bus ride over, she and a friend stuck up a conversation and I was relieved there was a connection. Boy was I wrong.

Throughout the evening, she was very emotional and constantly complained. She cried because she broke a plastic champagne flute that she had borrowed from a friend. Huh? Here we are listening to Dave Koz and she’s in tears about a broken plastic flute-something that couldn’t be resolved at that moment. I suggested that she relax and look at the bright side and she responded sarcastically that wasn’t an option for her. At that moment, she CHOSE to have a bad attitude and I respected her choice BUT I refused to let her attitude negatively influence and impact my attitude and behavior. Since she didn’t know me well, she didn’t know that I am a professional “ignorer” and she was about to experience some of my best work. So despite her tears and bad attitude, I just sang louder and danced harder and refused to let her bad attitude interfere with my good time and as I do every year, I had a ball.

I honestly don’t believe that she intentionally set out to ruin our outing because she didn’t, she couldn’t. However, I don’t think she understood the negative impression and impact she was having on our group with her bad attitude. Because if she had, she would have known that having a bad attitude is an assurance that more than likely won’t fully experience TRUE friendSHIPS. Because at next year’s smooth jazz at the Hollywood Bowl, it will only be 29 of us going. Lastly, if you have a bad attitude think about how it negatively influences your attitude and behavior but also negatively impacts the attitude and behaviors of others. If you want to enjoy life and others, simply LOSE THE ATTITUDE!!!

SHIP TALK: Do you have a bad attitude? Why? Have you changed your attitude? How?

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4 Replies to “LOSE THE ATTITUDE?”

  1. Diana, you got it. I too had a bad attitude but when you are in a TRUE relationSHIP with GOD, it is kind of hard to be a negative person. True relationSHIP means we spend our days brightening the days of others. I try to check myself if I see me slipping. A bad attitude is ugly and puts us in a bad light. Thanks for reading my post.

  2. I make a conscious decision to have a positive attitude, every day. There’s so many good things (blessings) that a person can find throughout the day. Each day is a gift and I make sure I recognize them as such. If I’m not feeling well or am upset or angry about something or someone, I simply put those feelings aside at the moment so that I am not ruining a good time for those around me. Now I must admit, years ago, I have been a thorn in someone’s side because I had a bad attitude, but as I mature and rely on God even more, I’ve learned that it’s not about me. I give every situation to the Lord for Him to work out or correct. If I detect someone is tripping (bad attitude) I ignore them and refuse to entertain their negative energy. I love having a good time with Family and Friends, that are happy to be together and enjoy each other’s company.
    Life is not long enough to miss opportunities and blessings because of someone else’s issues.
    I’ve missed events and moments that I can NEVER get back, because of someone’s insecurities and bad attitudes.
    I can’t say it’ll never happen to me again, but it happen by any of the same individuals if I can help it.

  3. Carolyn, you are on point. I, too have had a bad attitude and even some days I’ll have one now. Yet, I’ve learned that Life is to be lived and as we go further and further down our journey, in order to receive the good parts of life, we have to shed layers. I believe that every step that we take, is an educational experience and as we learn the lessons from that particular experience, we have to shed limiting thoughts of ourselves and repaint the negative images and replacing them with images of forgiveness. Forgiveness of self and others. I appreciate you and may GOD continue to bless you. I know I have a very unique way of thinking about things and I really appreciate you getting it…lol. I’m waiting for your blog…..LOL

  4. I was thinking there has been times that I have displayed a bad attitude in my younger years. I admit I was stubborn and did not want others to tell me what to do. When I reflect back many issues contributed to my bad attitude. Being molested at a young age, abused by my first husband physically and mentally did not help. But, as we mature and change our perception and stop playing the victim we begin living differently. I decided to change my sorrow and pain into positive behaviors. I believe God turned my whole body mind and soul towards him and begin to show me who I am in him and he begin to define me. The cloak of pity pealed off. I stop being drab and sprinkled some joy where ever I go. I am 61 now and what I have learned, is bad behavior is deeply rooted and until you choose to root it out it will remain. It so nice to be set free. Learn to love yourself will change that negative behavior. But you much chose to change. Great blog Valerie

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