Expecting is the greatest impediment to living. In anticipation of tomorrow, it loses today” Lucius Seneca

Why is it as women when we meet a guy before we even go on our first date, we plan our entire life out with him? We spend hours daydreaming about our future despite us knowing very little about him. Will we marry him? Will we have his kids?  Does this type of thinking sabotage whatever potential relationSHIP that we may have? Does it set him and the relationship up with unrealistic expectations?

Dating is an observation period. It’s where you’re supposed to foster an environment in which both individuals can share their most vulnerable self.  It’s the time, you are supposed to HONESTLY share your thoughts and beliefs, your goals and aspirations, your spirituality, your wants, dislikes, your fetishes, etc. and you sit back and listen to his. These conversations are vital because it serves as the parameters for the relationship because it’s the beginning of non-sexual intimacy.

After you’ve learned these things about your potential mate, then we MUST assess and observe-do their actions align with their words? Are they walking the walk or just talking the talk? Anyone can string some words together that sound good and maybe even believable to impress us but have we seen the evidence? People will say anything to impress us but is it just talk?

Anticipation and daydreaming are nice action words but they can easily turn nightmarish when we fail to see if their actions are aligned with their words. This is a flag. People will tell you what they think you want to hear to get something from you but be wise, listen to your gut.

Don’t ignore the flags you feel in your gut just because you want to be in a relationSHIP. If you acknowledge those flags, you can save yourself from heartbreak and emotional wreckage, so be wise and don’t ignore the lessons that SELF is providing for your protection.

SHIP TALK: Have you ever acknowledged or ignored a flag? How did the situation end?

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