There’s A HOLE IN MY HEART, where you once lived, and now its an empty space that can never be filled.”   Unknown

At some point in life, we’ve all experienced the loss of a loved one, and I’m no different. That’s why last week was so rough for me.  It was my dad’s birthday and I was consumed with sadness.  I miss him sooo much. Although it’s been 2 years since he passed away, I still think about him every day.  I miss everything about him. His lectures, our workout sessions, our talks, his advice, his laughs, and his hugs.  Even though I know he’s pain-free and in a better place, it still feels like there’s A HOLE IN YOUR HEART.  Can A HOLE IN YOUR HEART be repaired or patched up?  Do you miss someone so much it feels like there’s A HOLE IN YOUR HEART?   Lord knows I DO!!!  So for this week’s blog, let’s talk SHIP about how to patch A HOLE IN YOUR HEART!!!

Throughout the years, including this one, I’ve attended homegoing services for the parents of some of my friends and family.  However, I had no idea that the emotional pain of losing someone you loved, would cause A HOLE IN YOUR HEARTNow I do!!! Where there was once a relationSHIP filled with love, is now an empty HOLE.  But, how are we supposed to live life with A HOLE IN OUR HEART?   Learning how to live life with A HOLE IN YOUR HEART is actually the first step toward living.  After all, we must acknowledge and accept that the HOLE exists. This will determine the types of patches we’ll need to mend the HOLE. Can A HOLE IN YOUR HEART be patched?

Patching A HOLE IN YOUR HEART is certainly possible but it only happens when we allow ourselves to FEEL.  To feel the pain.  To feel the loss, the emptiness, the sadness, and the anger.  Patching allows us to reminisce.  To laugh.  To cry.  Patching A HOLE IN YOUR HEART gives us permission to experience our emotions and allows us to FEEL the way we want and need to FEEL.  And I did just that this weekend.  Saturday, I was in an emotional funk, so I slept in and laid around most of the day.  Knowing I had some patchwork to do, eventually, I got up and allowed myself to FEEL.   After having a good long cry, I immediately began to feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude.  I was thankful to GOD for gifting me with such a wonderful man whom I had the privilege of calling daddy. Grateful for the host of wonderful memories that we shared. Grateful for our understanding of love-he knew I loved him and I knew he loved me back.  Grateful for a daddy who instilled in me the faith and the wisdom to ALWAYS trust GOD.  Grateful that he advised me to take GOD with me EVERYWHERE I’d go because I’d need HIM. Grateful that GOD allowed us, as a family, to be with him as he took his last breath.  My day ended with me being grateful that I’d given myself permission to express the emotions that I had truly felt because it enabled me to start patching the HOLE IN MY HEART. 

Some people say it gets better in time, does it?  Hmmm…. I don’t think so because I miss my dad more than I could ever imagine, and am still learning how to live without him.  I’ve learned that even though the HOLE IN MY HEART was caused by the loss of love, it can be patched by filling it with remembrances of the love we once shared. Truthfully speaking, even when we do our patchwork-allow ourselves to feel– it won’t totally repair the HOLE but it CAN and WILL give us comfort.  So express your emotions. Cry when you feel like it.  Scream if you have to. Smile and laugh when a pleasant memory comes to mind.  These are the emotional patches we need to mend the HOLE IN OUR HEARTS.  Find comfort in knowing that “the Lord is near the brokenhearted”  Psalms 34:18.  Know that with GOD all things are possible and if you let HIM, HE CAN and WILL patch up the HOLE IN YOUR HEART too!!! 

P.S.-Although I truly hope this post helps someone else, honestly, this week’s post was therapeutic for me.  It’s just a loving way for me to patch the HOLE IN MY HEART.  Rest in Love Dad….

SHIP TALK:   Do you miss someone so much it feels like there is A HOLE IN YOUR HEART?  How do you cope?

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